


Lacrimosa

by marquisobscurite



Series: To Let Go [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Bad Pearl AU, Depression, Gen, Hurt, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 15:29:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9447605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marquisobscurite/pseuds/marquisobscurite
Summary: After months of looking for him.... She returned home, but sadly she kept looking, despite her fellow compatriots wishes not to.Part 2 of the To Let Go series.





	

  _Lacrimosa dies illa_

It has been months since Pearl suspended her search for Steven, all to simply stop Peridot and her robonoids. Funny thing was, before Garnet came to take her back, she had heard of the incoming Homeworld Gem from the national news at one of Atlas City’s bars. She figured that the remaining Crystal Gems could take care of her, but when Garnet came to take her back to the temple, she was proven wrong. Now here she was, stuck at the temple waiting for Peridot to make her move, and yet nothing happened. No robonoids attack, no invasion from any Homeworld Gems, nothing but normality... well as normality will be to an extraterrestrial polymorphic sentient space rock that has a habit of smoking like a furnace and drinking with the thirst of a dehydrated man from the hottest desert would be. And yet, despite preparing for any activity from Peridot,and hanging out with Greg and training Connie. She slowly couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt for suspending her search, it was at first bearable,  but as time goes by she could feel the guilt begin to weigh upon her bit by bit, until she couldn’t bare it anymore. She began secretly to search for clues for Steven within Beach City and the neighboring Ocean Town, Only to return back at the temple, with nothing but disappointment and the stench of alcohol. Oddly enough, the few people who noticed Pearl’s activities tend to ignore them, not wanting to cause any stress on her. 

Later on, as the leaves begin to change color, Amethyst tried to get her fellow Gems to be ‘closer’ by using the human holidays as an excuse. It at first appeared to show some progress, with both Garnet and Pearl having an actual conversation with each other at Halloween. As Thanksgiving came along, their feast which include Greg, seem to be a success, as Pearl and Garnet seemed to enjoy each other's company, as though nothing ever happened. Sadly when Christmas came, Pearl was missing for first half of the holiday, only to return in the afternoon with the stench of burnt tobacco and alcohol, it would seem that she had decided to search for Steven that day of all days. At first neither Amethyst nor Garnet dare spoke a word as Pearl sulkingly walk by them, it was only when Pearl was about to enter her room, that Garnet found her voice,

“where were you?” she demanded of Pearl.

Pearl simply glanced emptily at Garnet, before turning back to the Crystal gate, and heading towards her  room. This simple response angered Garnet, with her response being marching towards the gate, and activated it to head towards Pearl’s room. 

Upon entering Pearl’s room, she could see Pearl simply sitting down among the central waterfalls surface, smoking and hopelessly staring at the ceiling. Garnet froze for a moment before leaving the room, knowing it would be useless to even talk to pearl in this state.

The next couple weeks before New Year's, caused more strain within the Crystal Gems more particularly between Garnet and Pearl. Their response to each other presence over the weeks began from short conversations to utter avoidance of each other. All of which broke the hope of their shortest member, who dream of having a united team, a united family as before.

When New Year’s came, each member of the Crystal Gems observed the holiday on their own ways. For Amethyst it was to simply enjoy the celebrations with her fellow human friends. For Garnet, it was simply fighting any corrupted gem she has a chance to. As for Pearl she choose to look for any clues of Steven over the entire only to return back to one of the local bars drinking away her sorrows. As Pearl returns back to Beach House, just to find an angry Garnet waiting for her.

“Where were you!” Garnet demand of Pearl, with anger seeping from her voice.

Pearl simply ignored her and tried to walk past her, only for Pearl to be yanked back by Garnet, with the same question being asked.

“Looking for Steven.... Is that wrong to do Garnet? Is it so wrong to try and look for him?” Pearl asked in a deadpanned voice, not even trying to look Garnet in the eye. 

“It’s not wrong,  but it’s what you do after finding nothing that is wrong, the drinking and smoking.” Garnet responded to her.

“Your one to talk, you’re so focus on hunting down corrupted gems, that you always go head first in a suicidal charge. If you want to lecture, then go ahead, but don’t act like you have the moral high ground.” Pearl spat back at her, before walking past her, to get to her room. Only to be stopped by Garnet’s hand grasping her her arm tightly.

“What did you say?” Garnet demanded at Pearl harshly, as though aggravated by Pearl's words. Unfortunately Pearl didn’t see the danger she was in, only irked by Garnet’s not-so subtle aggression towards her. 

“You heard me, you have right to tell me, what I can an-” Pearl’s rant was interrupted when Garnet’s gauntleted fist came in connect with Pearls face, sending Pearl directly towards the Crystal Gate’s door. At first both were shocked by the taller gem’s action, Garnet was the first snapping out of her shock and tried to apologize to Pearl, but sadly no words came out of her mouth. As the thinner gem, activated the Gate, and went to her room, leaving Garnet alone wallowing in her self-loathing.

As for Pearl, when she enter her room, she went to the tallest fountain in her room, and silently watched the water flowing by....

How idiotic of her to not see that punch coming, How dare she say those things to Garnet of all people.... How dare she secretly search for Steven behind her compatriots back... only to give up entirely for the human’s viceful pleasures. Damn it she could barely stand the sight of her own reflection.... Her reflection.... Reflection.... Like a mirror.

With the quickest of her abilities she summoned the Mirror, and stared at it hopefully, before saying:

_ “Show me.... Steven” _


End file.
